It starts out a simple piece of paper, a request for proposal. You shyly make eye contact with it, skim over its basic info... 50 rooms on peak, brown eyes, adequate F&B, cute butt. The infatuation begins. You eye up the other hotels in competition, and immediately rule them out knowing they will be gone by the end of the first show... too big, too expensive, too needy. You have the availability and you feel a connection so you immediately respond Yes.
The first rose is yours!
On the next episode you chat more with the planner/Bachelor and find out all your similarities! Could it be true love? You share some more information with the "Bachelor" and feel a connection. Their conference seems too good to be true. To improve the relationship you drop off some coffee at their office but unfortunately run into another hotel rep. Those group dates are never fun, but at the end of the day, the planner announces that they want to come to your hotel to find out more.
A Hometown date, and another rose!!
The site tour/hometown date arrives and another episode begins. You wear your best outfit, put on some extra eye make-up, make reservations at a nice restaurant and nervously wait for the suitor to arrive. They pull up in the front circle. Awkward at first, but then you show them all the perks of the hotel, being careful to avoid mentioning that recent messy break-up with that other corporate account. If all goes well, you have time to show off the hot tub (what episode of the Bachelor doesn't involve this scene?), and then the tour leads to meal and maybe some wine.
While you are breaking bread with the client/Bachelor, you can help but wonder who else they have been seeing. Did they spend yesterday with that tall blond hotel down the street? Did they have a connection with that cute suburban hotel? It is agonizing to imagine, so you focus only on your hopes of another rose, and perhaps a signed contract. You know the client wants to experience all parts of the hotel, and the inevitable overnight date happen. The next morning, you get to work and find an e-mail waiting for you. Your heart races. "Dear Erin, I had a great visit. I can envision my group in your hotel. I'd like to review your contract."
Wow, well done! Another rose and another round!
The final episode arrives... You've put your best foot forward, showed off all your assets, offered up some great concessions, and now you wait. The quarter is almost up and you haven't yet achieved your quota. You can envision the Bachelor getting down on one knee and handing you a signed contract, but you don't want to get your heart broken.
Chris Harrison walks in the room and the most dramatic rose ceremony is about to begin. You know this is it. The final rose awaits. Will you be swept off your feet with a sparkly signed contract?? Or will you be left standing on a mountaintop, completely heartbroken while you try to make sense of it to your boss.
The music swells, the anticipation rises and you see it. A new e-mail with an attachment. Could it be? YES, it is! Your eyes fill with happy tears and you immediately hit print. You sweep it off the printer and hold it close to your heart. You knew being pregnant during this episode of the bachelor would be extra dramatic, but you didn't realize how emotional you would be. True happiness at last! As you countersign the contract, the sunset glistens off the staple and you smile knowing that you received the final rose!
Right now you're not sure if you'll spend the rest of your life waiting for roses. Let's be real... We can't all be Trista.
But you are happy knowing you got the rose and you can finally relax.
Until next season...
Erin,
ReplyDeleteYou should send this in to a magazine. Very funny, clever and well written. You have a future as a writer!