My Vow to the Bean

Dear Bean,
Eight years ago this month, I was busy finishing my junior year at OU (we can't wait to introduce you to Athens!).  I was busy working at the Phon-a-thon and at the TCOM school, and I was busy trying my best to focus on the rest of the world while I was falling madly in love with your Dad (sorry Bean, this might get sappy). 

Your Dad and I had just met about a month and a half ago and I was giddy about him.  I knew in my heart that he was the one I would grow old with.  I'm not sure if he knew this yet, but I was busy planning Our Someday.  Our Someday when we would live in the same state... our Someday when we would share an address... Our Someday when we would say I Do... Our Someday when we would own a home... and Our Someday when we would bring a baby (or 2 or 3) back to our home and watch them grow up...

Turns out we made it there.  We are living our Someday!  Pinch me!  I'm not sure how eight years have passed but it's been a good ride and we somehow landed in Someday. 

While I was daydreaming away about our Someday, I forgot to include the bumps along the road of life and the uncertainty curveballs that often get thrown our way.  The important stuff is all in check still (the baby's health, our health and our family's health), but looming uncertainty about some other stuff has really been weighing on me.  I am a huge advocate in the Everything happening for a Reason theory, so tonight I'm officially going to begin believing it (and not just saying I believe it). 

You are my main priority, Bean, so I officially vow to do my absolute best to stop stressing about items out of my control and start focusing on stuff within my control.  I'll stop keeping you awake at night worrying about the uncertainty, and I'll start daydreaming more about meeting you and bringing you home.  I'm willing to accept that everything in the world does not have to be picture perfect in order to give you a very happy life (I'm a bit of a control freak, so this is hard for me to accept).  I'm willing to admit that Someday is not a fairy tale, it is a real life journey. 

I can't promise I'll be perfect at this, but I'll give it 200%.  In the meantime, keep on growing and we'll see you again soon. 

Much Love,
Your (somewhat crazy) Mom

PS  If you cooperate on May 2nd and show the sonogram tech if you are a Pink Bean or Blue Bean, I'll (consider) buying you a car when you turn 16.